Dave Twentyman: Shaun Wane makes me madder than a little person with yo-yo

Dave Twentyman
Dave Twentyman

As I walked into the club on the Hornsea coast I could hear the sea lapping the shore just a few feet away.

I opened the entrance door and gulped with nervous anticipation. My comedy Jedi senses were warning me that I was about to be stepping outside of my comfort zone.

Disappointment is etched on the face of Shaun Wane - aka Mr Potato Head - as he watches his Wigan side lose the Grand Final to Leeds

Disappointment is etched on the face of Shaun Wane - aka Mr Potato Head - as he watches his Wigan side lose the Grand Final to Leeds

My fears were confirmed when I spotted an elderly couple trying to negotiate their zimmer frame down the stairs.

I stepped in and carried the zimmer frame down the stairs for them and as the elderly couple thanked me, I turned to look at the audience. This lot were older than Highlander. Some of these probably had National Insurance numbers that were in single figures.

The average age was easily around the 70 mark, which is probably around double the life expectancy if you live in Blackpool.

The stage light wasn’t great either, but on reflection it was probably for the best. If they’d turned the light any brighter, most of the audience might have stood up and started walking towards it.

My hatred for Wigan RL had subsided over the years but since Mr Potato Head took over the reigns, I’ve wanted them to fail at every opportunity

To their credit, they were an absolute joy and very appreciative.

Saturday night in Oxford was a different beast. It was a young, vibrant audience and you could still see the hopes and dreams in their eyes. Mind you, they’ve probably got no pension to look forward to, so 1-0 to Hornsea. And it costs them about £500,000 for a 1 bedroom flat down there so let’s make that 2-0 to Hornsea.

I was in a great mood for this gig, having witnessed Leeds defeat the pies on TV screens in the venue.

My hatred for Wigan RL had subsided over the years but since Mr Potato Head took over the reigns, I’ve wanted them to fail at every opportunity.

His suggestion during last week that Ben Flower had nothing to prove, and that last years defeat against us was a ‘moral victory’ for them and that we’d have been disappointed to only win by the 14-6 scoreline, got me madder than a little person with a yo-yo.

So big congratulations to Leeds!!