Dave Twentyman - The scent of Widnes Market

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I WAS in Middlesbrough on Saturday night with a couple of great acts, one being my mate, Chris McCausland.

Chris is blind so he came up with me although he stated that he didn’t fancy sharing the driving duties.

I think there’s definitely some truth in that if you unfortunately lose one of your senses, it heightens the other senses.

I say this because he didn’t fall for it when I said we were driving in a Mercedes, “Sounds like a Peugeot 206 to me mate”.

He reminds me of Al Pacino out of the film, Scent Of A Woman, were he can smell ladies perfume. “mmmm Tommy Hilfiger...Widnes Market”.

* I WAS gutted to miss the meteor flying over on the same night. Although there were question marks as to whether it really was a meteor and not just Charlie Adam’s penalty miss from the Carling Cup Final, coming back into the earth’s atmosphere.

* THE Russian Presidential Election has been decided and the winner is....Sepp Blatter!!! Oh, hold on, wrong box lads, that one’s for the other ‘not fixed honest’ election result.

I really feel for countries like Russia, Zimbabwe, Iran etc were there are claims of widespread fraud.

I mean imagine living in a country were the party/candidate with the lowest votes somehow ends up in power....hold on? (Yeah I’m looking at you Lib Dems).

* I’LL finish off with a lovely little story I heard last week. It’s one of them stories where the story teller claims that it really happened to them but you know it’s really one of them stories that gets passed around. This is how I heard it.

There’s this bloke in Leigh in his 60’s. He’s a big fella, it’s not muscle but the result of lots of ale, chips and gravy.

He wears braces to hold his pants up. Anyway, he’s walking down the road in Leigh when a car pulls over and the window comes down.

The young man in the car politely says “Excuse me mate, do you know if there’s any big boozers in Leigh”?

The fella turns slowly with a thumb pulling on each brace and proudly says in his broad Leigh accent “Thas looking at him lad”.